Eat a Banana Whole

Just try this. Make sure there are some friends for witnesses/added hilarity/test subjects.

Stick a banana in your mouth, the whole thing, peel and all, and take the biggest bite you can.

And chew.

If you actually try this please post a comment. After drawing myself eating that bag of flour in today's comic I was reminded of the banana experiments.


WOOOO IT'S FRIDAY EVERYBODY PARTY HARD YEAH LET'S GO!!!

A Canister of Planter’s 'Energy Mix' Nuts.

Rests upon my kitchen’s table. It was my dinner. It and an Ozarka bottle’s contents.

So, gather round kiddos and listen to my words! I assume the manners of Homer and leaves of olive encircle my crown. ‘And young dawn, with fingertips of rose reached across the eastern sky…’

I need a lyre.

So, the epic conclusion of a grocery visit is unfolded above. There’s much compressed into those two strips and I’m depending on our fully literate and discerning audience to appreciate these things.

With little better than my own thoughts as fuel, I press on.

An observation: We are 35 days and 3 hours from the opening of Spiderman 3 and 56 days from Pirates 3. I couldn’t find a link for the latter. Sorry.

Thrills and giggles. I’m yet to see TMNT, though. Roommates agree, it’s good.

-Arrivederci!

That Toad ate my childhood

Speaking of Toads, since it is Wednesday, thus procuring a new Toad comic, I'm sure a good deal of you have seen this.

If not, check it out, because pictures of abnormally large amphibians are hilarious.

In relation to Shawn's post:

You have gained +2 Napping Exp.

I took a good nap today.

Sanity units running low. Respawn.

A Cold, Cold Cod.

Haha, do those titles tickle me! Isn’t that unexpected? Posed as a question but imposed as an exclamation. Expanding the mind, and you’re welcome.

Well I’ve been viewing a map of the world for the past fifteen minutes. There was more, but I deemed it uninteresting and it was deleted.

So, picture life like an RPG. I’m about to say something socially awkward!

This item does not work here.

Or, does variable A apply to this test question?

This item does not work here.

Or, you try and deploy a multi-passenger vehicle in a public restroom? Would have saved me plenty of embarrassment.

-Arrivederci!

Animation

I want to get some more content on the website, and I've always been fascinated with animation, so I have set out on a side project. Here is what I was able to get so far tonight. Just a bouncing ball, but eventually I'd like to make a real live person stroll through my woodland scene here. Click the image, and then hit refresh until it moves in real time. Tell me what you think!

Chef Johann

As you can tell from the comic, Chef Johann is in town, sort of. He's actually in Austin, but that's in Texas so it still counts. John cooks things. He's really good at it. Check out his blog, where he talks about cooking and life as a cooker of things.

When John and I were younger I once threw up olives all over the floor of his room in the middle of the night, while sleeping on a cot. He rolled over from the top bunk of his bunk bed and muttered,
"Ah $*@%."

I think we were in the 3rd grade or something.


I hate olives.

New Desktop Background

I have crafted myself a new desktop background, which you can see in action below.
Download this background in your resolution (if you dig it) here: Once you click on the link, zoom in on it, then right click the full size image and set it to the background.
1680x1050
1440x900
1280x1024
1152x864
1024x768
800x600

Enjoy!

Rabbit Soup

After a brief Spring Break hiatus we are back and swinging into the 11th gear; the one in which, when Captain Picard asks to go warp 9, you can say,

"I am going faster than you Picard, because I'm in the 11th gear."

I hope you enjoy the last segment of the beloved bunny story. On Wednesday we'll post them altogether in case you got lost or forgot what happened two weeks ago.

I'm actually going to bed before midnight on a Sunday for the first time in a long time.

And on that note, have a good week everyone, the pollen count is up! Beware! You may feel stuffy and your car will sport a disgusting yellow film for the next month.

Adieu.

Some Dark, Glorious Energy

I have a moment’s time, and so I thought I might update.

Perhaps a little background. A foreword though; this story is mostly unexceptional.

I find myself in my room, self-exiled from the lower story of my house. My younger brother has DV-R’d a recent episode of The Office, which he and my sister felt a strong inclination to view. Unremarkable, except for the fact they are completely uninformed about season 3 thus far. The sister, particularly, is even worse. I don’t think she’s seen but one episode of season 2.

Now, I note this event because unlike my fictitious alter-ego, I do not watch Grey’s Anatomy. Never even seen an episode. However, I am thoroughly enraptured by The Office. I acquainted myself with the series late last fall. But only with season two. This means I’m left unawares as to the state of Jim and Pam’s Greco-tragic (but could be comic?) romance and in the dark about my beloved Dwight’s latest escapades.

Well this is wearing on too long and so I will conclude with saying my sister has threatened exposing (like a terrorist might) crucial plot developments in a temporally displaced and emotionally eviscerated manner. I should have tidied up that last sentence.

This exacerbates a pertusion my psyche has been affected by recently. I seem surrounded by fiends who draw some dark, glorious energy from spoiling movies, television shows, books, and (most inhumanly) video games. Zelda: Twilight Princess, no less!

Well I’m through. I will probably go help Sterling with a mural later. I slept so late, he had to proceed without me and for that I formally apologize. To Sterling.

Sorry.

-Arrivederci!

This is a great idea

This is a great idea. I've been wanting to do this for years.

I'm shipping the XFX 6800xt back, apparently it required 18a on a +12volt rail out of the power supply, equivalent to purchasing a $150 power supply that costs twice as much as that stupid video card. Instead I'm going with a BFG 6600GT OC, which won't be as power hungry, but still more than twice as fast as my current BFG FX5500.

Spring Break is over.

:(

Well I’m glad

To report my test went painlessly. I don’t know if I did well or not, but that’s not as important as the fact I do not feel psychologically deranged by the event.

As Sterling states in the post below, we are delaying our exciting conclusion yet one more day. This is because, we know you are all sophisticates. Naturally, the caliber of the entertainment you seek must sate your tastes. And thus!

So give us another day, and you’ll be three utils of happy greater than if we had done otherwise.

That’s how we gauge these things you know. We have a machine that calculates happiness and we base our decisions accordingly.

-Arrivederci!

Delay till Wednesday

I apologize for the delay, again. I have a ton going on this week, as well as trying to relax and see my friends that are in town for Spring Break. On top of that, my new video card (XFX nVidia 6800XT 256mb GDDR3 - I'll give you a run down on its performance tomorrow) came today, and that was a "must-install now" item, which led to playing around w/the dual monitor support etc.

And finally, Shawn and I are trying to fit two comics into one, so the comic I've been trying to finish is rather lengthy, and I have to be at work early tomorrow. I like getting more than six hours of sleep.

On an extended note, the daylights savings switch always messes me up, I'm horrible at adapting to time changes. I should be back to normal and the Friday comic will be on time.

Thank you for your patience, besides! Who's looking at webcomics over spring break? Go party!

Sony incorrectly declared geniuses due to this video

Yes, this is a great video, for a very fun looking game. A game on the PS3, actually. However, for those of you stumbling over your mad props for Sony and how "Sony isn't a total screwup after all," I'd like to say this.

This game is just a high def version of The Incredible Machine that's multiplayer. The puzzles looked rather simple, however I'm sure it gets more complicated and clever. I think it will be a pretty fun game. Just don't go all crazy because something fun is coming out for the PS3, and don't for a second think your 360 is rendered "worthless," because of this clip of a cute game.

Keep in mind that Bioshock is still coming out for the 360. Seeing anything like that on PS3? Nope, sorry.

As I Lay Writing.

The warm moisture from my accounting test’s breath is condensing on my neck’s nape. Hungrily, it waits for the morning. But with my 12-cup coffee maker as my companion and a loaded mug by my side, I will overwhelm my attacker and cast it into eternal darkness.

Yes, another night finds me beneath the glaring heat of our five-pronged kitchen light fixture, writing, thinking, and fighting. The shadows are drawn long and there is only the quiet pressings of my keyboard and the flicking on of the thermostat.

And also my roommates giggling in the room adjacent about some high-pitched youtube video or something. Ah, I’d rather be in their carefree, spring-breaking shoes. But my duty holds me fast. I must answer to my children’s children when they ask why I didn’t do better in school. A youtube video would not justify.

So, with these dread thoughts, I must leave you all. Enjoy your spring break if it has started. I float on to my Normandy Beach.

There my enemy and I shall struggle. Alone.

-Arrivederci!

Bioshock

There's another demonstration video for Bioshock that everyone has got to see. This game is reason alone to get that 8800GTX video card - or you could buy an Xbox 360, I think they cost about the same.

Everyone rock out their spring break. I'm going to be working myself to death, beginning that mural project. Here's a link to my design for it.

Ignore the person "for scale" on the design, as I wasn't given the budget I wanted for the project; thus making the mural about 1/3 as tall as I wanted it to be.

It's going to be 6' high and roughly 30' long across a concrete wall. Fun fun.

Bother, Bother, Bother, SNape!

So, just in case anyone has a differing opinion.


MY OVERBEARING, OPPRESSIVE OPINIONS WILL FOLLOW THIS SENTENCE.

Mac keyboards are awful. I'm typing this blog on one (a Mac thing at school) rght now, and the space bar is sticking like mad. I have to hammer it with my thumb to get it to function. I'm also sure these keyboards are like $50 to replace, too.

Mac mice are also terrible. Even the ones with the little "scroll wheel/miniature ball" that's supposed to do something.

Geology is a horribly boring class. My teacher is overzealous in her goalof turning us all into geologists. We don't care. I fall asleep in that class every day, and yet I made a 95 on her lasttest. Howdid that happen? Easy multiple choice tests. Bingo.

MTV is worthless garbage. They play it all day long at this dumbcampus in this stupid computer room full of half-way functioning Maccomputers. Ones with broken space bars orSafari randomly won't open a page, inexplicably. Just because it doesn't "feel like it."

Music videos are generally uncreative, regurgitated ideas set to newlyrics and old beats.

Reality TV shows are generally bad and loaded with censorship bleeps.

If you get in front of me at Randalls at 9:17pm with 27 Yoplait yogurts, and 46 other items when I'm trying to buy ONE box of Tazo Zen tea, and they're only running one register, I'mnot your friend anymore, ever.

Ihate this keyboard.

THis Mac wouldn't let meupload my avatar :(

Tests

I took two tests today. Now they are done, and I feel better. The next set of tests will soon fill that void, the one characterized by uncertainty and a slightly unconscious panicked sensation that fills every moment until the test is done and over with.

I'm not terribly fond of tests. I like them as much as I like cheap assorted chocolates with cherry filling, which is to say; not very much so.

Anywho, new Toad today.

FYI all of our ad slots were "purchased" for $0.00 today, however now the bidding can begin. We're just excited that new things are happening around here, and we hope you've noticed things changing as well.

We've been hearing murmurs of t-shirts and the like, so I'll work on procuring a design for you all to wear.

I bought another liquid containing device at the monthly pottery sale at the school, it's beautiful. I put orange juice into it, and then drank it. Yum.

Another significant purchase I made today, sort of an indulgence/needing a video card that will support running two monitors, since I now have a 17" CRT in addition to my 20.1 LCD, I would like to use it. I found an amazing deal at newegg.com on an open box XFX Nvidia 6800XT 256mb GDDR3 8x AGP card for a mere $70. I'm thrilled to finally be putting a powerful video card into my computer. I just checked newegg.com to find a link for anyone interested, but it's already gone. They have the same card for a PCI-Express slot for $90 if anyone's in the market for that.

Oh well! Looks like I got lucky!

I said TO BE CONTINUED

But it probably won’t be.

As an aside, and independent of the comic reality, I have a friend. This friend is a she. She has recently purchased a rabbit. I’m fairly convinced (but don’t let this dissipate the illusion) that rabbits are completely unthinking animals. They are bundles of nerves; instinctual impulses. Can I use a semicolon there?

But they are gosh darn cute. I’ll admit that her's is, and I can’t well imagine a better splint for a broken ego than a gosh darn cute bunny. But I can poorly imagine one.

I suppose we never will know who it was at that door. But some mysteries are too profound. Like what did actually happen on track three? Tootsie pops and that sort of thing.

-Arrivederci!

New Nav Buttons

I crafted new navigation buttons for Blue House Comics today, tell me what you think of them. Do they make things easier? That was the goal, and of course, enhanced aesthetic appeal.

Shawn meeting the bunny is supposed to pick up from the DJ incident, explaining why Shawn is so distraught in the first panel. This will continue over the next few comics, so stay tuned to see what happens next!

Peace OUT.

WAY OUT THERE.

Sunday Sketch #3, I think

Sorry the Sunday sketch is so late in the day, I was completely exhausted last night, and fought with a headache all night long. If you have had that particular experience, you know that's no fun.

The reason behind my acute exhaustion was the 6 hour caricature session I performed at a 4 hour Spring Fling event up in the woodlands at my community college. I couldn't figure out why, but I had an hour long line in front of me full of parents and their children, various siblings, friends, and a desperate housewife(?). Maybe. I wasn't sure, but at the same time, I was sure. Oh well.

My booth stayed open 2 hours after the fling was over, while I finished drawing all of the little children. Phew. Some of them had been waiting 2+ hours for me to draw their picture. Nothing amazing, just a simple likeness of the kids in Speedball india ink on an 18x24 sized sheet of 50lb. paper. I had a sign up that said "Free Caricatures," and managed to collect $101 in tips, plus the $250 the school ended up paying me (originally settled at $150) for staying for two hours past the designated closing time. I made sure I finished everyone in the line. Not too many events that I know of will allow you to single-handedly collect $350 in 6 hours.

And the best part is, a couple people asked for my contact info, supposedly to hire me for further events. So why all of the gloating and money talk?

I want all of the artists/cartoonists out there to know that you actually can make money with your skill, despite what people tell you. Look in the paper for upcoming fairs and the like, advertise yourself, get a few business cards made (I needed some of those yesterday), draw some faces. Find a populated public place and find out if the landlord or whoever will let you set up a caricature shop. It is possible, and parents LOVE to throw money at people that can draw their children. Almost every parent walked off saying how they were headed to Hobby Lobby to get my <10 minute rendition of their child framed. Don't give up, you can do it!

Anyways, I hope I inspired at least one of you cartoonists out there to make things happen, and if not, oh well. I tried.

I wouldn't doubt less than 10 people even read this blog, but maybe I inspired someone. Maybe someone will go out there and invent a better blender due to my inspirational words.

We need better blenders, folks.

Crawfish Consumption

Kathy and I are going to some sort of crawfish event with my boss at Tree Search, one of the nurseries we do a lot of business with. It's a customer appreciation event, so free food will be had. I'm looking forward to getting off work at 2:30 to eat free food.

Shawn has his own newfangled avatar now.

Quinten has been bugging me about it, and I promise someday, I'll update the banner. It's just going to take a good amount of time and I want it to look great.

And no, Shawn does not have a little cob pipe, but I can assure you he will when he's old and writing detective stories.

Enjoy the weekend ya'll!

I am NOT dead.

In fact, I’m a good bit living. But what other place I return from, I’m not sure you, audience, can understand or accept. It was a place full of strangeness and curiosity. I doubt you shall believe me, because I don’t fully believe myself. Nevertheless, I recount it:

The morning sky spread itself like fresh linen, presenting a day to attend classes and otherwise squander with socially acceptable pursuits. But my story begins sooner, in the still inky span of pre-dawn.

My alarm trumpets a tinny “techno” loop interposing itself upon my now bewildered dream. As the dream-haze morphs into an awaking-haze, I hurriedly thumb the “disable” button of my alarm. My eyes are fixed on my roommate across from me. He hates it when my alarm wakes him. And I am not ashamed to say I fear him. There are stories of him chewing through shower rods and crushing his head through dry wall during fits of berserkergang rage. He is still asleep and I let my held breath escape.

What happens next you will assume to be embellished. I suspect this myself, as my memory is too convinced of impossibilities that a psychological phenomena can only explain their existence.
I have brushed my teeth, showered, and changed, all but set to carry on my morning routine, when something odd happens.

There is a knock on my door, and with my roommates all asleep, I answer it. It is not a neighbor. It is not an acquaintance.

It is not a human.



-----TO BE CONTINUED-------